Video Games and Children (part 1)

There is a ton of research out on the effects of video games and children.  Frankly, reading this sort of research bores me to death.  I wish they had a video game app that explained the effects.  One author caught my attention.  Agne Suziedelyte has written a working paper entitled "Can Video Games Affect Children's Cognitive and Non-cognitive Skills."*   I had hoped I could breeze through it and give a quick summary here.  That is not so likely! She has managed to complicate the thing in a rather serious effort.

 In fact, I have been reading this article and then rereading it. There are a couple of reasons this merits attention.  The first reason relates to the broad claim that "There is no evidence that video game playing increases aggressiveness in children." (pg. 3) In general such broad statements should be taken with a grain of salt.  This is research speak and can be unintentionally misleading.  This sort of statement usually means that the research that has been done is correlational. Correlational means there is a connection but it hasn't proven which causes the other. It's kind of a chicken and egg which came first sort of thing. A statement like this one, can make it sound that there is no relationship between violence and video games. That seems unlikely.   Bushman, B. and Anderson C. wrote in 2002 (*2) that "players who had prior experience playing violent video games responded with an increased level of aggression when they encountered confrontation."

The question is, why would anyone make a broad claim that "there is no evidence of video games increasing violence?"  Well, it just means that researchers need to do a lot more work to really understand the impact video games do have.  That is a warning to us all.  These video games are common and there is a lot of peer pressure out there to buy the lastest offering from Playcenter Five, or to buy the new best Murderer's Creed edition. ( Please excuse the made up names!) That doesn't mean that the games are safe. There is also no evidence that sticking your hand in a toaster causes redness.  We do know that burning yourself causes redness.  I just don't believe that anyone has actually selected a sample of children and a control group to study sticking hands into toasters.  That would be cruel.

The second reason for looking closely at this paper is because this paper comes out of the School of Economics and not the Psychology Department.  I don't know what prompted this Doctoral Student in economics to study video game violence.  The more I dig in to this article, the more I respect the rigor of her methods. It does make sense for this to be an economics study.  You can bet that video games are big business. Forbes magazine(*3) quotes DFC Intelligence (a research firm) as estimating that the "worldwide video game industry will reach 70.1 billion dollars by 2015." Do you think that big business might like to have some research saying there is no proven causality between video games and violence  or that there are positive impacts of video games?

 I'm not suggesting any sort of evil conspiracy.  I am just saying that 70.1 billion dollars is a lot of money.  It wouldn't be surprising if someone who makes their income slicing their piece of the (video game) pie might want to protect that income from research  that would hinder sales. Research that suggested that video games cause children to be more violent could be problematic.

The bottom line is this.  Before you fork out 40$ a game  for Christmas gifts for your kids, take time to ask yourself if you will really monitor their use and play?  Will you really set and follow through with limits? If you will, okay maybe this gift is right for you and your family.  If you won't, I would recommend Santa and his elves should find something else to put under the Christmas tree.

 *Suziedelyte, Agnes. Australian School of Business Research Paper No. 2012 ECON37,  reprinted from the Social Science Research Network Electronic Paper Collection:  http://ssm.com/abstract=2140983)

 *2 Bushman, B. and Anderson C.(2002). Violent Video Games and Hostile Expectations: A Test of the General Aggression Model. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 28, 1679-1686

*3 Rishe, Patrick. Trends-in-the-Multi-Billion Dollar Video Game Industry: QA With Gaming Champ Fatality, Forbes, 12/23/2011.

Help Needed:Video Game update Pre-Christmas Shopping

I heard a parent recently tell me that video games were bad for kids.  At least that is what they were told by a therapist.  That comment is too general for my taste.  In my experience, it has more to do with the supervision of the type of video game, the amount of time playing video games, and whether the child has other outside activities and behaviors.  Common sense tends to prevail on these sorts of things.  

1) Here is a suggestion no one bothers to heed:  Don't put the video games in bedrooms. Get them out where you can see what they are playing and doing. 

2) Do use learning and problem solving software. Unfortunately my repertoire of these is sadly out of date. 

Please help me update this by posting a comment below.  Here are my favorites from days of yore. 

a) Freddie Fish

b) Kid's Chess

c) Pajama Sam

d) Sponge Bob typing.

e) Mavis Bacon typing.

f) Rosetta Stone Language Software

g) Nancy Drew 

h) Google Sketch-up

3) Please limit time on computers and video games. 

4) Please closely monitor any online gaming activity.

I will be doing some research and trying to summarize it in human terms. 

Please, please help me update current learning and problem solving software.

Scott

Ewoks, Halloween Candy and Post Halloween Fears

My folks didn't let us watch much in the way of scary movies around Halloween   It always seemed like bedtime came really early in October. I wonder if my folks didn't move the clocks ahead of Daylight Savings time, just so we wouldn't see all the scary movies we were missing..  We got to go trick or treating.  We got to carve pumpkins and have Halloween parties.  Unfortunately, without the scary stuff Halloween became an exercise in gross food.  The scariest thing that happened most Halloweens was hearing horror stories about hooks in somebody 's Halloween cookie or caramel apple.

Developmentally, children work through and develop anger around 2-3 and fears around 4-5.  Though I beg you to forgive the gross oversimplification here. Please be attuned to your kids sleep habits following Halloween   Parents usually say their kids don't have nightmares.  Their kid's will then draw me pictures in elaborate detail describing their nightmares to me. The parents are often stunned.

We work with fear through play and repetition. Halloween is a kind of play where we have the opportunity to face our fears. Most kids have a lot of fun dressing up in costumes.  A little bit of role playing adventure is  also good to overcome fears. Sometimes it is spontaneous. When I was doing observations at HeadStart, the kids would express their fears on the playground.  Sometimes a child or a group of children would suddenly start yelling and chasing me.  Sometimes, I would be arrested by a mob of 20-30 three foot tall policeman.  Some days, I would be captured by 20-30  three foot tall monsters. It was a lot like the scene with the Ewoks from "The Return of the Jedi."  It was a lot of work making sure I didn't fall on one of the cute little fur balls. 

The Grimm's fairy tales were also a good way to work through fears.  I don't remember where, but I read one time that modern day, politically correct, disney-esque versions of  these tales actually caused more nightmares.  If I remember correctly, the original tales (which resulted in the death of the villain and were therefore considered more violent), actually were more resolved in children's minds and caused less anxiety. The more politically correct version where the villain saw the error of their ways were next best  and caused some anxiety among children who feared that the villains changed and would change back.  Children are very concrete and don't trust this type of change. The most anxiety provoking were the stories that the villain was run off and never seen again.  Apparently, never seen again is less reassuring than dead. So if you like to tell scary makeup stories with your kids.  Kill the bad guy.  They will sleep better.  Please don't let young children watch Freddie, Jason, Jack or Snakes on Planes.

Oh and one more thing.  If you kids are having trouble after Halloween give me a call 641-753-0440.  Dealing with fears is one of the things I do best.  I think it may come from having older siblings.  Older siblings are never quite as cautious as their parents, about the stories they tell their younger siblings.  

Keep your EVERYTHING to your self!

I was sitting at a football game recently and heard a couple of  parents conversing with their children.  The parents were doing a nice job of  separating and calmly dealing with their kids but one thing they said really tickled my funny bone. It also made me remember a lot of car trips with my own kids. These dialogues(by list) are a synthesis of some of those trips. I write this so you know; it's not just you.

 Things kids say in cars

5. How long till we get there?

4. I'm hungry

3. I have to go to the bathroom

2. I don't feel good

1. Mom he's touching me.

Things parents say in cars

5. About 15 minutes

4. We just ate!

3. Can you hold it?

2. Honey, you BETTER pull over

1. Keep your hands to yourself

15 minutes later

Other things kids say in car 

5. How long till we get there?

4. It smells in here

3. I have to go to the bathroom

2. My stomach hurts

1. Mom, he's touching me.

Other things parents say in cars

5. About 15 minutes

4. Open the windows

3. Again????

2. HONEY STOP THE CAR...NOW

1. Keep your feet to yourself. 

15 minutes later

5. How long till we get there

Everyone replies:

 ABOUT 15 MINUTES

4. I have to go to the bathroom

Everyone replies:

AGAIN?

3. My stomach hurts

Everyone replies:

DAD STOP THE CAR!

2. Open the windows

1. Mom, he's touching me

Everyone:

"KEEP YOUR EVERYTHING TO YOURSELF"

 I recently read an article about building resilience in children. It was pretty boring.  No, not re-silence in children. This article is not about ways to shut them up. Resilience.  Yes, yes, I know, resilience is one of those words  psychologists use  that take a reasonably interesting subject and suck the life out of it. In a nutshell, (have you ever noticed that when you try to summarize something psychologists say you always end up having to use the phrase; "in a nutshell?"  I think that says something about psychologists.) resilience is the ability to bounce back from something stressful. Like a Weeble.  Do you remember Weebles?   You know; "Weebles wobble but they don't fall down."  That is resilience.

We need to be resilient or once something bad happens, we would just collapse. Get a bad grade? Don't bother with even trying to study anymore.  Have an argument with a spouse?  Don't bother getting out of bed. Sounds a bit like avoidance and a lot like what happens when people get depressed.  Fortunately, most of us take time to lick our wounds when something bad happens, but then we get back up and get back at it. That's resilience. We can "try and try again."

ADHD kids are very resilient.  One minute they are getting scolded and the next minute they are up and back doing the same behavior. Resilience is both a blessing and a curse for them. When there isn't a consolidation of learning from the life setback...the pattern is just repeated.  We all do this sometimes.  Kids with ADHD do it over and over again.  To the point of exasperating their parents.  This has a very unfortunate consequence.  Parents would like to be able to tell their kids something once and move on. Do you remember that old shaming statement? "Fool me once shame on  you, fool me twice shame on me."   In other words, we must learn things the first time or we are fools.  What a load of judgmental crap!

 Folks, if you have children with ADHD  you are going to have to use repetition to overcome their ADHD.  No, absolutely, do not try to get first time obedience. I know it would make your life easier.  But you have got to think it through.  If you crush their resilience you will be left with a child that can't bounce back and still can't stop doing the impulsive, hyperactive and inattentive things they do.  They won't learn.  The child just won't have any joy in them at all. Instead of a Weeble you will have an egg.  Same basic size and shape.  Same basic properties.

Just remember..., eggs break!

Gentle Hands & Angry Hands

 When I work with kids on anger, we often spend time talking about about hands.  For young children we talk all the things we can do with hands: pick up a spoon, throw a ball, count our fingers and play with a toy.  We talk about open hands and shaking hands.  We talk about using hammers and tools for our working hands.  We talk about strong hands for lifting and carrying.  We talk closed fists and angry hands.  We talk about kind and gentle hands.

We talk about choices.  It is important to discuss the right time to use our strong hands. We talk about walking with hands in our pockets in the store so we don't touch things that are not our own.  We do not run with our hands in our pockets because we need our hands to protect us when we fall (I made up a silly song for the Head Start Preschool kids for that part).  We talk about when to use a comforting hand with a friend.  We talked about using our strong hands for work but choosing to use our words instead of our fists when we are angry. 

There is a psychological test called the Hand Test (Wagner, E.E., The Hand Test Manual for Administration, Interpretation and Scoring, Los Angeles: Western Psychological Services, 1962)  that involves rating and evaluating peoples response to hands in various positions as a means to attempt to predict aggressive behaviors. The use of hands in different position got me thinking about  our hands and how we use them.  That thought would have probably laid dormant if I hadn't been leisure reading a Louis L'Amour novel at the time. I don't recall which one.  The character in the story discussed that the 'hand shake' was performed with the right hand and was a reassuring gesture because it showed that the sword hand was empty. I don't know what Louis thought about being left handed. However,  it got me thinking about what we say with our hands. It got me thinking about what my parents said to me with their hands.

When I was very young I often sat in my father's lap and played with his thumbs while he talked. 

His hands were furry, more than most.  His fingers were long and squarely tipped.  I would play "Church and Steeple" and twiddle his thumbs round and about.  "Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, whoops Johnny, whoops Johnny" was another favorite game.  Once my father got his thumb stuck in the cup holder in the pew at church.  I was probably playing with it at the time. He was very embarrassed by that.   He had rough callouses on his palms from working in the garden or his shop.  His hands were gentle and rarely spanked. My sisters may remember that differently. I was one of the younger kids in a large family.  His hands were strong he could hold onto most anything he could grab onto.  He wasn't a tall or big man and the strength in his hands always surprised me. He told me once that when he was young he had a habit of chewing his nails and if I think on it, I can remember him doing that once in awhile but not on a regular basis. In later years he had quite a tremor and it disturbed me to watch his hands fumble and struggle.  

My mothers hands were smooth and long. Larry Wilkins once came up to me after recess and told me that my mother had the longest finger he had ever seen.  My mother was a teacher and had recess duty and Larry was ...well Larry, so I am quite sure he was on the wrong end of her pointing finger.  My mother would sit in the middle of the pew and if any of us kids were misbehaving we would soon feel a knuckle thunk us in the side of the head (NOT A RECOMMENDED PARENTING TECHNIQUE).  With 6 kids it kept us in line. I also remember my Mother's hands kneading bread on the kitchen counter and sewing up britches on the couch. I remember her teaching me to follow the words in a book with my finger so I could look at the pictures and not loose my place. I remember her teaching my sisters cross stitch and knitting.  I remember her carrying a coffee cup wherever she went.  Mostly I remember her goodbye touch on my face before she died. 

Hands can say almost anything.  What will your children remember about your hands?

Watermelon: Don't Break the Ice Game

As a parent, you probably know that when your kids have friends over, the friends will likely be fascinated by some toy or video game that your child has and they don't. Your child will probably be bored playing with the game they have become accustomed to using everyday.  You might have to coach your child to play the same old game with their friends a few times, even though your child really doesn't want to do that. Teaching your child to delay gratification and take turns is good parenting.  You might have to step in if the friend becomes fixated with a particular toy even after an appropriate amount of time has passed by. You might set a time limit or number of times they play one game. Another suggestion is breaking for a snack and then redirecting them to play outside for awhile.

Here is a fun food activity for a  party or group of kids.  It is based on the  "Don't Break the Ice" game  made by Hasbro.

1) Using a watermelon, slice it in half the long way down its axis.

2) Now continue making 2 to 3 inch slices down the long axis of each half.
 The rhine of each slice will be continuous AND UNCUT with one side more narrow than the other.

3) Place the narrow side face down on a cutting board.
 Keeping your knife point toward the center of the watermelon slice, carefully cut the interior of each section into 2-3 inch blocks.  The blocks always need to be more narrow at the bottom then the top so they don't fall out prematurely.

4) Set the watermelon slices carefully up on 4 short plastic cups located around the perimeter of the watermelon and on top of a flat baking tray  to catch the mess when the "watermelon ice" gets broken.

5) Each child may now take a turn with a fork, trying to pluck out a watermelon block without crashing the rest of the watermelon into the baking tray.